On Self-Pity, Self-Compassion and Controlling What We Can
The newsletter helping you make tomorrow a little better than today
Welcome back to your weekly dose of wisdom and wellness, with science-backed insights you can use to improve your physical, mental and emotional well-being. READER WISDOM
“We can’t control a lot of what happens to us, but we can learn to control how we respond to these events. Easier said than done but we can start by getting out of our own way. We can start by taking small positive actions to give us confidence to keep going, when bumps in the road occur.”
— Zoe Lambourne
“Honestly, self-pity does more harm than good. It’s easy to dwell on the unfair things that happen to us and stay sulking while the best thing, yet hard, could have been to pick ourselves up and forge ahead.”
— Calista Agoha
“The struggle to stick to a goal, even when you know it’s attainable, is something many of us grapple with. I know about the temptation of instant gratification and the power of small, consistent steps. It’s a reminder that self-discipline and self-compassion go hand in hand.”
— Kristie Leong M.D.
Those insights are from readers commenting on Why the Hell Do We Self-Sabotage? by Tim Rees
HEALTHY READING
A selection of this week’s other informative and insightful articles:
Is Therapy Forever, or Should We Bring Back the Stiff Upper Lip?
When his therapist said it was time to fly solo, this writer put up a fight. Therapy is glorious and effective. But now he’s wondering: Do we talk too much? New research, in fact, suggests too much talking about our troubles could be making us ill.
— By Niall Stewart
Poor Sleep Linked to High Blood Pressure and a Downward Health Spiral
If your sleep suffers, so does your health, in what becomes a circle of negative effects. Here’s what to do.
— By Robert Roy Britt
My Sister’s Death Shapes How I Think About Suicide
Step 1 in reducing the record number of suicides is to reduce the perception of shame. How? “One should look others in the eye, speak loudly and clearly, and explain why this is not a shameful topic,” writes this psychiatrist, based on personal and professional experience.
— By John Kruse MD, PhD
The Pains of a Life Without Intuition
Autistic people like this writer often feel disconnected from the world, lonely and confused. “Now,” she writes, “with psychological terms such as interoception and alexithymia becoming more well-known, we can finally put words to our struggles and examine the ways having no intuition plays out in our lives and the decisions we make in them.”
— By Annika Hotta
Video Game Addiction, Not Video-Driven Violence, is the Problem
This story, written by a psychiatrist and neuroscientist, might surprise you, and certainly flips the script of conventional wisdom: “While we’re concerned about the non-existent connection between playing video games and hurting others,” he writes, “we’ve been ignoring the very real problem of video game addiction.”
— By John Kruse MD, PhD
RANDOM BIT OF WISDOM
“The wiser you get, the more experience you have, the more you see people for who they are as human beings, as opposed to figures you have to fight against.
— Vanessa Williams
Wise & Well writers are physicians, psychiatrists, research scientists, dieticians, fitness experts, journalists and other professionals who share their expertise to help you make tomorrow a little better than today. If you like any of these highly curated, professionally edited stories, please follow Wise & Well and/or subscribe to this newsletter. — Rob